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Things I Say While I'm Driving
  • Me:

    What the fuck are you doing. What. The fuck. Are you doing.

  • Me:

    NICE BLINKER ASSHOLE.

  • Me:

    Why the FUCK are we not even going to speed limit. Why.

  • Me:

    I AM GOING TEN MILES PER HOUR OVER THE SPEED LIMIT WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT

  • Me:

    Shit is that a cop? No.

  • Me:

    Shit THAT is a cop.

  • Me:

    /dinosaur screams/

lampsarepeopletoo:

i dont even sleep anymore i just die for a couple hours each day

Her Advice Cost Us A Life by Emarosa from the album: Relativity

postcause:

Her Advice Cost Us A Life by Emarosa

lordtrash:

If I ever like your sad post

It is support

I am not enjoying your tears

College kids literally don’t care about walking in the way of cars at school because we’re like “hit me i don’t care pay my tuition.”

"Hit me my thesis is due in 12 hours and I haven’t started it"

"Hit me I have a final in an hour and I didn’t study"

"Hit me I’ve been on a 24 hour drinking binge and I’m invincible"

"Hit me. You’re a university vehicle and I’ll get free tuition."

"Hit me I feel like a failure anyway"

(via infelicific)

bullied:

isn’t it weird that you can have friends but also have no friends at the same time

dipsetflag:

banduluu:

People still say no bueno? :/

Pretty sure Spanish people still speak spanish

If you were in a different body, would you have the same personality?
(via suspend)

waxjism:

austere-fallen-angel:

does anybody else clean their phone screen by wiping it on their boob or is that just me

what else is the point of boobs really

vicvondoombwhahaha:

You can’t convince me this raccoon isn’t elegantly playing the deepest sonata you’ll ever hear on a avant garde harp

vicvondoombwhahaha:

You can’t convince me this raccoon isn’t elegantly playing the deepest sonata you’ll ever hear on a avant garde harp

nodaybuttodaytodefygravity:

i would have no use for this

there’s not a reason in the world i could ever come up with to use this product

but i want it

greatjackwhiteshark:

isn’t it strange looking back on the first time you heard your favorite band and how you didn’t know how much they would end up meaning to you in the future